Family Court mediation

Before a separation or divorce case can begin, the Family Court sends you to mediation. This page explains what that means. This is the court’s own mediation process, which is separate from voluntary mediation arranged privately.

What mediation is for

A mediator is a trained neutral person from an official list. The mediator does not decide anything. The job is, first, to see whether you and your spouse can reconcile and, if you cannot, to help you reach an agreement on how to separate or divorce.

When it applies

• Separation and divorce. A spouse who wants to bring a case first asks the court for authorisation, and the court then summons you both to a mediator. If you are already separated by a deed or judgment, you do not need it for a divorce.
• Disputes about children and maintenance between people who are not married, and about changing an existing separation or divorce arrangement, also go through mediation.
• Changing a court-approved deed by agreement does not need mediation. You file a joint application.

What you file

The spouse who starts the process files a sworn note listing their assets and liabilities, an income statement for the last three years (the FS3, or equivalent), and proposals on property, the children and maintenance. The other spouse must reply within 20 days with their own proposals.

How it runs

• The mediator. The mediator is chosen from the official list. The mediator’s fees depend on how the mediator is appointed, and we explain this at the outset.
• Time. Generally at least six sessions within eight months, which can be extended by up to four months, by agreement or by the court for a valid reason. If the mediator thinks reconciliation or agreement is unlikely, the mediator can tell the judge before the period runs out, so mediation that is unsuccessful may be ended earlier.
• The sessions. The mediator can see you separately or together, with your advocates, and can hear your children. If either of you has no advocate, the mediator explains that you can have one and that you should understand any agreement before you sign it.
• Your children. The court can appoint a children’s advocate to represent them. The court can also appoint a support person, who may assess what help the family needs.
• Privacy. What is said in mediation cannot be used as evidence in court. Evidence of assets obtained from banks or other institutions can be.
• Staying away. If a party does not attend, the mediator asks for a written explanation and, if it is not justified, tells the court, which can take it into account.
• Domestic violence. If the mediator becomes aware of, or suspects, domestic violence, the mediator must immediately inform the judge (regulation 21). The procedure in regulation 20(1) for suspending mediation and holding an urgent hearing within four days has not yet come into force (Legal Notice 219 of 2026). Urgent applications under article 37 of the Civil Code remain available.

Decisions during mediation

You do not have to wait for the end of mediation to settle urgent questions.

• If you agree on maintenance, the children’s care, custody, residence or access, you file a joint application and the court, once satisfied the agreement is fair and in the best interests of everyone, issues a decree in private.
• If you disagree, either of you can ask the court to decide such points in the meantime. The court decides within 20 days, or sets a hearing within 20 days and decides within 15 days after it.

How mediation ends

If the mediator reconciles you, the court closes the case. If not, or if the time limit runs out, the mediator tells the court, and the court grants the authorisation to bring the case. If you have agreed to separate by agreement or to apply for divorce jointly, the draft goes to the court for approval.